Friday, April 26, 2013

Words from the celebration 2 of 3

As promised, here is the second eulogy for Carla written by Jay Graft. If you know Jay, he doesn't go by a script. He just needs a topic and will run with it. His topic was Carla. When I asked him if he would like to speak, he said, "Large crowd...captive audience..." He was all in! 
Just before the services he asked me to review some of the content of his proposed conversation. There was story in there that was a bit over the top for the crowd, so I kindly said "You can't say that in there!" To your disappointment, the G-rated version of the actual talk is below...missing is the ad libbing and the laughter of the crowd.

Jay Graft's talk 2/26/2013 

Thoughts regarding Carla 
I’ve been asked, by Jeff, to share some of my thoughts and stories regarding Carla.

Just by looking into this jam packed room, it’s obvious the impact Carla has had on all our lives.  Her light she shared, still shines, it shines even brighter with all of us here celebrating Carla.

McCall and Callie, please take these stories and remember the fun times and person your mother was.

Is there anyone who doesn’t know Carla’s catch phrase, “Oh my Hell!”?  I’ve got to be honest; she used that on me countless times.  It didn’t matter if I was at fault or not.  The best part of hearing “Oh my Hell!” was the twinkle in Carla’s eye and the subtle smile she’d flash at you.

I met Carla a few times before she and Jeff were married, nothing big, just a “Hi” or something said as we passed each other.  It was after they were married I got to truly get to see Carla in full Carla mode.

Andrew Wyllie and I went to visit Jeff and Carla in their first house, shortly after they had completed their renovations.  Carla was working in the kitchen in and amongst her beloved pigs.  We chitchatted for a minute or two and then Jeff, Andrew, and I went to the family room to watch a ball game.  Jeff left to get some salsa and chips for us to eat.  Andrew and I sat there on the light colored sectional, with the white throw rug under the glass table. 

When Jeff returned with the salsa and chips, he had me pick up my feet and promptly placed an unfolded newspaper on the floor.  He then put another unfolded section across my lap.  Carla was beside herself, with Jeff.  She let Jeff know how rude it was to treat me that way, and that Jeff should promptly remove the papers.  Jeff told Carla she had no idea how badly I could spill, and to make Jeff’s point, I dropped salsa onto both papers.

Carla looked at me, unbelieving in what she saw.  It was the first time I’d received “Oh my Hell!” from Carla.  She apologized to Jeff for getting on him and thanking him for being so cognizant of his friend’s lousy eating habits.  This would become the Carla I’d get to know oh so well.

How many of you have attended a party with, or hosted, by Carla?  Carla was the type of person if there were more than three people gathered, a party could shortly ensue.

Halloween was the holiday Carla truly enjoyed.  The decorations, the costumes, and best of all the party she would be having.  Carla loved to play games that could cause embarrassment to those who played.  She would wear the brightest lipstick and pass an orange to an unsuspecting male, only to leave a smudged lip print on his person. 

Carla loved to paint walls.  She would get so excited to tell of the new color she’d chosen and what it would match.  Being the good friend that I am, I exploited Carla’s painting love to get help painting my house.  Carla suggested the color for Joanna’s and my kitchen, and then she helped me paint it.  When it was finished she felt something was missing.  On the accent wall she freehand painted a square, matching the color of the other wall, so that a picture would “pop” more.  We’ve received more compliments about this very simple task.

Free labor does come at a price, however.  Carla was helping with a large 20 foot wall in the family room.  She was up on a ladder, cutting the corner, when my phone rang, it was my wife, seeing how things were going.  I was talking to Joanna on the speaker, when Carla started screeching, a spider had come towards Carla.  Joanna asked what was going on, without missing a beat, Carla loudly proclaimed that she and I had been caught making out!  Good thing Joanna knew all about Carla proclivity for practical jokes. 

Community Working Stories

Utah Jazz Volunteer for formal Sneakers and Suit event

-Not impressed by the player’s status

-made a name for herself when she called C.J. Miles/Ronnie Brewer Baby-faced

 -Matt Harpring- Seated at Matt’s table made Matt stand because Matt’s wife had just had a baby.  Once Matt was properly chastised by wife, Carla was able to get what she really wanted, the baby. 

Hospital Stories

We know how Carla worked to make all of us more at ease with her illness, even when she was tired and sick.

  • Visiting Carla when she had to go the bathroom.  I excused myself to leave and from the bathroom she chided, “With three girls in your house, this still embarrasses you?”

  • Becoming passionate about others who were going through leukemia treatments.

  • Meeting new patients and telling them she was their new friend.

  • Husband with wife who was uncomfortable during treatment and Carla taking over.

Carla’s December Blog 
I was also approached by my case worker and picked by the clinic to participate for the “Center for International Blood and Marrow Transplant Research” (BMT Conference Survivorship panel.) It will be held here in SLC in February 13-17. (Only 2 people were chosen from all the hospitals around the state). I’ll possibly be answering questions from nurses and a doctor around the United States about what is was like to be a transplant patient, how I was treated, what could be improved etc. I feel very honored….and yes….a little nervous!

 Last Visit in October

Seeing Carla dancing Proud Mary with Erin and making sure they had the “rolling” arms going at right time.

Hearing Carla laugh and seeing her smile.  When she left she complained her cheeks hurt from laughing so much.

Final Passage:

John 14:2

In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.

We all know, Carla is there right now picking out the paint and working on the décor for these rooms.


2 comments:

Blonde African Americans said...

Right on, Jay and I go to the same gym and we often chat about your family I hope all is going well.

Erica Hill said...

Thanks for sharing. I was sad we were too far away to make it to the ceremony, so I'm glad I can read the stories and think of Carla now.